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QUOTE OF THE WEEK

"It's a class thing. At OSU, they teach you to be a man. At USC, it's all about football."

OSU receiver Ray Small,
like the Trojans needed any help getting up of for the overrated Buckeyes

ARCHIVES

2009-11-17

Week 11 NFL Notes

Miami at Carolina: Dolphins leads 3-0, outscored Cats 63-39

Indy at Baltimore: Colts lead 6-2, have won 5 straight

Washington at Dallas: Dallas leads 57-37-2, teams split last 6

Cleveland at Detroit: Lions lead 13-4, won 4 of last 5

San Francisco at Green Bay: Cheese lead 28-25-1, won 7 straight

Buffalo at Jacksonville: Bills lead 5-3, teams split last 4

Pittsburgh at KC: Steelers lead 17-8, won 4 of last 7

Seattle at Minnesota: Microsoft leads 6-4, Favres' have won 2 of last 3

Atlanta at NYG: Dirty Birds lead 10-9, won 3 of last 5

New Orleans at Tampa Bay: Bourbon Street leads 20-14, Tampa's won 3 of 4

Arizona at St. Louis: Rams lead 30-28-2, Cards have won 6 straight

San Diego at Denver: Sietes lead 53-45-1, 619 has won 5 of 7

NYJ at New England: Namath's lead 50-47-1, two straight

Cincinnati at Oakland: Raiders lead 17-8, 3 of 4

Philadelphia at Chicago: Bears lead 26-8-1, won last 2

Tennessee at Houston: Titans lead 11-3, 7 of 8

2009-11-12

Week 10 NFL Notes

San Francisco 10, Chicago 6: Bears lead 29-28-1; Bears have won 4 of the last 6

Atlanta at Carolina: Birds lead 17-11, teams have split last 6

Tampa Bay at Miami: Series tied at 4, Bucs have won 3 straight

Detroit at Minnesota: All Days lead 63-30-2, won 13 of 14

Jacksonville at NY Jets: MoJos lead 5-2, won 4 of 5

Cincinnati at Pittsburgh: Sixes lead 47-31, won 5 of 7

New Orleans at St Louis: Rams lead 38-29, 3 of last 4

Buffalo at Tennessee: Titans lead 24-14 won 5 of last 6

Denver at Washington: Sietes lead 6-4, won 6 of last 8

KC at Oakland: KC leads 51-45-2, won 10 of 13

Seattle at Arizona: Fitzgerald's lead 11-9 won 4 of 5

Dallas at Green Bay: Joneses lead 12-10 won 4 of 6. All time score: Dallas 488-477

Philadelphia at San Diego: Bolts lead 5-4, won 3 of last 5

New England at Indianapolis: Brady's lead 42-27, Peyton has won 3 of last 4

Baltimore at Cleveland: Crab Cakes lead 14-7, 5 of last 7

2009-11-04

NFL Week 9 Notes

Washington at Atlanta: Foreskins lead 14-5-1, won three of last five in series

Arizona at Chicago: Bears lead 55-26-6, won 5 of last 6

Baltimore at Cincinnati: Ravens lead 15-11; Carson's have won 6 of last 9

Houston at Indianapolis: Colts lead 13-1 only loss was in 2006

KC at Jacksonville: Jags lead 5-2, won 3 of last 4

Miami at New England: Miami leads 48-36; NE has won 8 of the last 11

Green Bay at Tampa Bay: Cheese leads 29-20-1, Tampa has won 3 of last

Carolina at New Orleans: Cats lead 16-12, 6 of the last 7

Detroit at Seattle: Starbucks leads 6-4; Lions have won 3 of last 5

SD at NYG: Giants lead 5-4, won 3 of last 5

Tennessee at SF: Singletary's lead 7-4 won 6 of 8

Dallas at Philadelphia: Joneses lead 53-43, McNabb's won 13 of last 18

Pittsburgh at Denver: Sietes lead 13-6-1, 5 of last 7

2009-10-30

Week 8 NFL Notes

Denver at Baltimore: Series tie at 3, Los Sietes have won 3 of last 5, loser has scored 10 or less in three straight in series.

Houston at Buffalo: Chicken Wings lead series 3-1, won the last two.

Cleveland at Chicago: PD's lead 9-4, and won 3 of last 4

Seattle at Dallas: Joneses lead 7-4; Grungeville has won 3 of the last 5

St. Louis at Detroit: Lambs lead 41-37-1; Cowardlies have won 4 of 6

Minnesota at Green Bay: Cheese leads 49-46-1, 6 of last 7, and 2-1 without 4

San Francisco at Indy: Peyton's lead 23-18, Singletary's have won 7 of last 9

Miami at NYJ: Jets lead 46-39-1, 8 of the last 10

Oakland at San Diego: Oakland leads 54-42-2, 619 has won 12 of 14

Jacksonville at Tennessee: Fishers lead 16-12; MJD has won 6 of 10

Carolina at Arizona: Steve Smiths' lead 6-2 won 5 in a row

NYG at Philadelphia: Maras lead 79-67-2, 3 of last 4

Atlanta at New Orleans: Dirty Birds lead 44-35; Bourbon Street has won 5 of last 6

2009-10-17

Week 6 NFL Notes

Houston @ Cincinnati: Bengals lead 3-1, Houston won last year.

Detroit @ Green Bay: Cheese leads 86-64-7, 15 of last 17. Last Cowardlies win: 2005

St. Louis @Jacksonville: Lambs lead 2-0, all time scoring 41-35

Baltimore @ Minnesota: Ravens lead 2-1, won last 2, series scoring: 77-64

NYG @ NO: NY leads 14-10, 4 of last 6 meetings.

Cleveland @ Pittsburgh: Sixes lead 57-55, 19 of last 22. Last Poopy Diapers win: 2003, all Time scoring: Sixes trail 2254-2241. PD 7 points or less in 5 of last 8 in series

Carolina @ Tampa Bay: Panthers lead 10-7, won 9 of last 12

KC @ Washington: KC leads 6-1, only Deadskins win: 1983

Philadelphia @ Oakland: Cheesesteaks lead 5-4, 4 of last 6

Arizona @ Seattle: Arizona leads 11-9; Starbucks has won 4 of the last 5

Tennessee @ New England: Brady's lead 20-15-1 won 3 of last 4

Buffalo @ NYJ: Bills lead 52-44, won 5 of last 9

Chicago @ Atlanta: Chicago leads 12-11, won 8 of last 10

Denver @ San Diego: 53-44-1, 619's have won 5 of last 8

2009-09-17

Bubbles to the drain

By Rob Havener

Doctor says you're cured,
But you still feel the pain
Aspirations in the clouds,
But your hopes go down the drain...
-- No one is to blame, Howard Jones (1985)

It was all there for the taking Saturday night in the Horseshoe. The Vests had USC on the ropes, a five point lead and the BEST CROWD I'VE EVER SEEN in 23 seasons of going to home games at Ohio Stadium. A record crowd of 106,033 raining a Scarlet colored hell on SC. Then, like a sneeze in a wind storm, it was gone.

For the sixth straight time OSU lost to a top ten opponent. They still haven't beaten SC since the 1974 Rose Bowl. I left the 'Shoe with one unshakeable feeling, that crowd deserved better. I've been in a fog since leaving the stadium Saturday. The same questions rattling around in my brain.

1. Where the hell is this 'explosive' offense the players have been talking about all spring and summer?
2. Why can't this staff get the plays called and subs in BEFORE the play clock expires?
3. When is the offensive line going to start, oh I don't know doing ANYTHING PRODUCTIVE AS IT RELATES TO FOOTBALL?????

A quick sidebar: What's the difference between one ton of shit and the OSU offensive line? One ton of shit deserves scholarship money. Now back to the column.

A lot has changed in college football since Jan. 3, 2003 and the only guy not aware of it is the Vest. The conservative run-based offense, punt and play defense stuff is fine if you don't have the horses, but that isn't the case here. This continually coming up short against the big boys is getting old. I'm not expecting The Vest to turn into Spurrier (although in 2006 he had his moments). In big games you've got to cut it loose, if for no other reason to throw the FAN BASE off the scent. If I know in section 26A that you're going to punt after a 1-yard run into a wall of defenders, so do Pete Carroll and Mack Brown.

As to the offensive line, what the F*** is going on here? These fat bastards have been as useless a broken condom for the last six seasons. I know Beanie ran for like 3,000 yards with these bums, but in short yardage and goal line they're terrible, just terrible. To paraphrase Dean Wormer: fat, slow and stupid is no way to play football son. In the trenches it's a four step process:

1. Remember the snap count
2. Get low and fire out strong
3. Bust somebody in the f*@#$*& mouth
4. Repeat

Is that so hard??? Guys in the trenches are supposed to be smart and tough, these bums are neither.

I'd like to know what the hell this staff is doing at practice with this team. The alleged coaching is, in a word, shameful. This staff has been together way too long for these amateur mistakes. It can't be that hard calling a play and getting the subs in can it?? The Vest has skated by on the 2002 title and 7-1 against TSUN long enough. He got pantsed by Urban Meyer, punked by Les Miles and Pete has given him a So Cal ass whipping AND a soul crusher in the 'Shoe. I understand he has the highest winning percentage to this point in OSU history, but now this is personal, I'll explain.

When I was 14, I went to my first game at the 'Shoe with my friend Tammy for her birthday. The final score: Indiana 31-10. That same season Aaron Marshall and I did the cabbage patch as Carlos Snow scored four touchdowns on the Gophers in the homecoming game. As a senior in high school Marshall, Eamon Fahey and I sold programs so we could get tickets to games in 1990. That home schedule included a lightning short loss to...USC.

After graduation, I began attending games with Jean Hansford, the late Senior Campus Planner at OSU. We went to all the big games: Michigan in 1992, '94, '96, '98, 2000 and ND in 1995. Jean's last major project was the stadium renovation which he got to enjoy in 2000-01. Jean died on Jan. 10 2002. 51 weeks before his alma mater shocked the world. His first year on the job was...1968.

So why am I telling you this? I thought a LOT about Jean Saturday night. He would have loved that crowd. The place was juiced in a way I've never seen and I've been to five Michigan games. He would have hated how the coaches have seemingly found ways to lose big games.

After the 13-9 loss to TSUN in 1996, we trudged out of the 'Shoe in almost total silence. All I could think about as we left Saturday was that day in 1996. If the Vest isn't careful, he'll NEVER get a crowd like that again.

One hundred six thousand people had, in fact, (save the SC fans) become one. The noise was so great, the love so strong, then...it was gone. As the team came to the south end of the stadium to sing Carmen Ohio, the full weight off the loss hit me like a shot to the stones.

I'm a pretty emotional dude, but I don't EVER show that in public. As I stood and listened to the team and the band all I could do was look to the heavens. In the crisp night air of a perfect late summer evening I looked up and said to Jean the only thing that summed up how I felt: You deserved better.

That was all I could say. As Jermaine and I left, all I heard was the quiet shuffling of feet. When you leave the 'Shoe after a loss it reminds me of what happens when you pull the drain stopper in the kitchen sink when you finish the dishes, it's like bubbles...

2009-09-08

Hail to the Victors...BFD!!!

By Terry Brown, Senior contributor

Seriously...the press is raving about Michigan beating up on Western Michigan...has the bar fallen that low in Ann Arbor? In years past they would be pounding on UM for scheduling those cupcakes, but now I think they are genuinely surprised that they won. And enough already of lauding the genius of his system and of rotating 3 QBs...as if he has an alternative!!! This week...they face ND and the press is saying they can win that one as well. I guess the possibility of beating ND does exist...but simply because ND might be a bigger train wreck than Michigan. This weeks match-up is lipstick on pig...from both sides. Rob asked me for my game by game predictions...and in all seriousness...to expect anything from this program is a fools errand. I think Michigan can lose everyone of them. They probably won't...but I'm sure they will give it their best shot.

Now I know winning cures all ills...and the world of Maize and Blue is soaring after last week's rout. But before we get to far removed, let us revisit last week's story. First...I am not surprised. I said from the start that this guy is trouble...and this is just the beginning. He is one of those guy that always has an undercurrent of impropriety around him. The level to which that undercurrent will rise and fall will vary, but trust me when I say there will be more allegations, accusations...and most definitely...suspensions in the coming months and years. The U. of M. is well on its way to being the "U" of the north. All we need is another year or two for him to get "his" kind of players on campus...you know...character guys like Pac-Man Jones and Chris Henry...and it's a done deal.

This program used to win with class...now if they win...it will be with an ass.

2009-08-22

Taken 4 (yet another) ride and other random thoughts

By Rob Havener

In what has become an annual right of the NFL off season, Brett Favre has unretired and signed with the Minnesota Vikings. In his Hall of Fame career he has been called many things: MVP, leader, legend, warrior and gunslinger to name a few. I'd like to add a few more: selfish, egotistical, liar, jackass AND did I mention ATTENTION STARVED A@@HOLE!!!!!

In the interest of full disclosure I gotta say this, I used to like Favre. When he was on the way up in his career he was the most fun to use on Tecmo Super Bowl. Id play as the Packers and throw 100 balls a game to Sterling Sharpe. Once Madden anointed him around 1995, I was done with him. Now back to our column.

I'm not old enough to remember the end of Joe Namath's career, but he couldn't have dragged out the end like ol' number 4. Favre has a chance to go out on his own terms, which very few of his peers do. If he would only, you know, LEAVE already. This has been going on since 2005 and damn it, it MUST STOP NOW! We NFL fans are tired of this s@#^, and want you to leave. Packer fans chill out. Viking fans, just shut up. The 2009 season will tell us if this was a good move. You know what the nightmare scenario for Favre is? Imagine week one Vikings have the ball second and four Favre gets blitzed and goes out Tom Brady style and blows an ACL 5 minutes into the 2009 opener. That sets up an eighteen week Favre watch. I will stop watching the NFL if that happens, not even joking, and I LOVE football. If you want to play, shut up and play. If you don't shut up and retire. All I ask is that you notice that the common denominator is SHUT UP.

On to new business:

• Plaxico gets 20 months for being a gun-toting jackass. Good Luck and Godspeed dumbass.


• Memphis vacates 2008 season: wait, we called that on the show...in 2008


• NFL investigating fight amongst Raiders coaching staff, Commitment to the sucker punch???


• Can USA Track and Field schedule a baton passing seminar...PLEASE???


• Lou Holtz has the Domers going 11-1 this year???? Can a get a kilo of whatever he's smoking???

2009-08-21

Greed and stupidity

By Terry Brown, Senior contributor

I'm still not sure what to say regarding the Michael Vick playing situation. That decision is best left to lawyers, union reps and the Commissioner. Their decision is in and since Philadelphia wanted him and McNabb signed off, there it is. Welcome back Mike, let the Nike PR machine make-over begin. However, he can make all the PSA's and visit all the summer camps possible, and it changes nothing. Because when given the chance to come clean, he lied to everyone involved. He is only apologetic now because he needs to be. Despite his level of displayed greed and stupidity, I believe his handlers will be able to suspend his involvement in his chosen recreation while in the NFL. I also believe that whatever character flaw (stupidity) allowed him to carry out those repeated acts of violence, then repeatedly lie about it (greed and stupidity) will never allow him to fully understand the fundamental premise that what he did was absolutely despicable.

If Vick is a product of his own greed and stupidity...then what is Plaxico? Similar sentence, no where near the similar level of crime. It became clear from the start, as with Vick, that the powers in NYC wanted to send a message. So now Plax gets two years off to mend the ankle, and the image. Greed on both sides of the courtroom in this case. But in the end..."Money....money changes everything..." (Cyndi Lauper)

On to Cal. I was just sent an email by Rob letting me know that Memphis is probably going to lose their Final Four appearance. He knows I am already aware, but friends always like to twist the knife a bit when the others team stumbles. However, lets not blur the facts. Derek Rose cheated in high school, and Marcus Camby took money by himself in '96. Neither act has anything to do with Cal, other than they played for him, because if it had, the NCAA would have hammered him. However they did play for him...so fool me once shame on you, twice...shame on me. What awaits in Lexington is anybody guess. Once again, we are dealing with greed and stupidity, but unlike the two previous examples, to what degree is yet to be determined.

State of Kentucky Side Bar: You would have done exactly what Pitino did...but never the less...this is exactly what greed and stupidity can lead to.

Favre is a Viking...finally. Greed and stupidity abound in this instance. We will at least wait to see how the arm surgery holds up before forming an opinion as to which party exhibited the greater amount of each. However, Favre's down home flavor has soured and Minnesota is probably three years late tot he table...so how much Sage will be needed to hide flavor of this mix is yet to be determined.

And finally, Tiger. I really cannot apply stupidity to him, but greed is there. However, the greed is not monetary. Tiger's greed is personal. He needs wins and records, not checks. His greed is in the belief that his strategy is superior. It usually is, and will be again, but it failed him at the Hazeltine. His unique ability to focus at times serves only to create the inability to adapt on a given day. But that which can defeat him, will also serve to make him stronger, and more unbeatable. So make no mistake. He is the number one player in the world, and in the history of the game. Greed will see to that and you are stupid not to accept it.

2009-07-21

Watson and Waltrip

By Terry Brown, Senior contributor

As I watched the final round off this years Open Championship, a few thoughts were running through my head. First, as I watched in awe at a 59 year old baby boomer leading the way, it illustrated what I know and love about the game. That it is not only timeless, but ageless as well. For unlike other sports, it is a game we can play until the last. So I was excited at the possibility of a Tom Watson victory, and the effect it would have on not only the golf world, but his entire generation. Tom Watson represented himself, and his generation in a manner that could never have been expected. A past champion with one more chance to Duel In The Sun. This time however, the duel was not with a fellow competitor, but with himself. This time, the duel was with all of the doubt, pain, and ineffectiveness that occurs from the inevitable attrition that time places on our bodies and minds. Playing golf in the cold, and wind is incredibly difficult for anyone of any age, as it wear one down in so many ways. Yet he went on to compete at an ageless level, and for 72 holes he won that duel as he allowed experience, not emotion to direct his play. It was truly inspiring.

The trouble was, that he would need to play 76 holes. So whether it was the emotions, or fatigue that dictated his play over those final four playoff holes, in the end it was too much. The crowd knew it, the announcers knew it, the viewing audience knew it, and most noticeably, Tom Watson knew it. Anyone who has ever played golf knows that momentum can vanish, or appear in an instant. Stewart Cink, who had spent four days on the edge of contention, and missed two birdie putts coming in, made birdie on 18 and was found himself as the leader in the clubhouse. Watson, the leader for most of those four days, bogeyed 18 and in that instant, momentum changed, the sun began to set, and duel quickly turned from triumph to tragedy.

At Turnberry, no one was prepared for Watson to show up, but when he did, he suddenly offered an aging and once dominant generation a return to the grandest of stages. Baby Boomers everywhere channeled their hope of winning the battle with time, and it seemed to be working. An interview with Nicklaus, a man known in his earlier years for his lack of emotion regarding competitors and individual achievement, showed genuine hope for his friends success. In fact he made mention of his first venture into this generations world of texting with a message of "...win one for the old folks..." Later that night, when asked what words he would offer Watson, Palmer offered simply "...I'm sorry...".

I mentioned I had a few thoughts while watching, and as things turned during that playoff, and the tone of the telecast took a downward turn, I found myself flashing back to the Douglas-Tyson fight, and a stunned Jim Lampley uttering an emotionless..."down goes Tyson." Stunned at the disappointment, and disbelief of what he had just witnessed. Then I flashed back to the 2001 Daytona 500 and a day that rocked a culture at it's very foundation, some of whom are still mourning that loss. I remembered listening to Darryl Waltrip in the announcers booth excited for his brothers win, but caught up in the greater emotion of the loss. A golfer has a caddie, a fighter a trainer, and a driver a crew chief, but in the end, they are alone when it counts most. Either you win the fight or lose but you are alone in the ring. For driver, either you cross the finish line first or not, but it is just you in that car. And for a golfer, your caddie can offer advice, but in the end, either you make the putt, or you don't. Cink made his putt, Douglas connected his punch, and Waltrip crossed that line first, and so they should rightly be celebrated for their feat. But more often as the journeymen try to celebrate their achievement of a lifelong dream, we focus on our disappointment of loss. Age has a way of putting things in perspective, and so perhaps there will come a time when we celebrate those victories as we do when our champions win. But for now, and most likely some time to come, the journeyman's victory will remain a footnote to a champions greater tragedy.

2009-07-20

Sometimes without Tiger, majors can still be fun

By Rob Havener

I woke up Sunday and after breakfast and before making dinner I watched a guy my dads’ age (a guy I hated as a kid) nearly win the British Open.

I suppose I should explain. When I was growing up, my father and I would watch Watch golf on Sundays while waiting for the next football season to arrive. On Sunday afternoon without fail, dad would call to me and we’d watch Tom Watson and Jack Nicklaus fight it out down the stretch, more often than not, Watson would prevail. We hated Watson, we were Nicklaus men. Those Sundays with Dad are among my fondest memories. I thought about those days as Watson played like a man half his 59 years for the first 71 holes of The Open. Then, it happened. He missed eight footer for par, and Stewart Cink finished him off in the four hole playoff, and for the first time ever I felt sad for Tom Watson.

The emergence of Tiger has taken some of the high drama out of Major Championship golf for a while. Tiger missing the cut and Watson turning back the clock made the 2009 Open Championship more fun to watch. Since April 1997 Tiger is supposed to win every Major. Tiger is super human, he doesn’t miss the cut in majors. This week he was reduced to trunk slamming and leaving town on Friday. We didn’t get to see the customary red shirt on Sunday as he marches toward major number 15.

As strange as this sounds, Tiger missing this cut showed that the show goes on even without the number one player in the world. The big story this week will be about how Old Tom just missed winning his sixth Open. This makes two years in a row that a guy older than fifty, finished in the top ten (Greg Norman in 2008). I hope that Dad was watching Sunday; I bet he even feels bad for Watson too. Stewart Cink is a great champion. His birdie on eighteen set up his win. I just wonder how I’d feel if Watson had made that eight footer? Dad, Tom did you old guys proud.

2009-05-06

Lions and Tiger and That Bird...Oh My!

By Terry Brown, Senior contributor

The Lions
They have a new logo, but my guess is they will still look like the same old Honolulu Blue pigs, just with newer lipstick. So unless Mongo, Barry and Bobby Layne suit up, go ahead and let them know they are on the clock for 2010.

The Tiger
Speaking of favorites, Mondays print, and Sunday's on-line headlines were typical; What's wrong with Tiger? Well...in a word...Nothing. Or rather...nothing relating to the surgery. He could be putting a bit better. But what's he got, 1 win and three top fives since the return. For God's sake he played the entire final round using a 3 Wood instead of a driver. And if he is struggling...SO WHAT. How about we make the story, and the headline about the guy who won the fricking tournament. I was not really an MJ fan, but I would think that unless he managed a triple double, the headlines were similar. Jordan Has An Off Night...Only scores 27. Sadly though, this nonsense will continue.

Congratulations to Sean O'Hair for winning, and exercising the demon of the Bay Hill loss.

And That Bird...OH MY!!
$103.50!!! Second highest win ticket in 135 years. How does this horse win? Well, it starts when the morning-line favorite gets scratched (first since 1949), and the post-time favorite gets waxed by 42 LENGTHS. Thanks for showing up! But it's not the first time a long-shot wins, in fact, I can recall several longshot winners in the recent past: War Emblem in '02, Charismatic in '99, and who can forget Giacomo in '05? Now, Mine That Bird has some pedigree history with the Derby. His lineage includes Birdstone, Grindstone, Unbridled, and Northern Dancer, but amidst his competition, he looked more like a candidate for Beulah Park than Churchill Downs. He was stuck in a poor gate (8), and got crowded at the start, but Borel, who has certainly become a top rider, reacted well, gathered his horse, and put together a perfect trip. On a track that insiders would call "sloppy fast", he allowed the others to sort themselves out, and tire themselves out as well. Then he did what every good rider does. He turned a mile and a quarter race into a six furlong sprint, and left them all looking as if they were stuck in the mud.

DERBY SIDEBARS

2009-04-16

42 Random Thoughts

By Rob Havener

Editor's note: This edition is in honor of Jackie Robinson Day in Major League Baseball. This one's for you Jackie.

1. When will Tiger figure out if he's plays the three metal or the damned 2 iron; he takes bogey out of play. If that happens he's closer to Jack. Damn it boy!
2. LeBron fans: Win a GAME in the NBA finals and maybe, no, just shut up.
3. How bored was I with the end of The Masters? I slept through the playoff.
4. My actual job is in retail so I have to say this; people are getting dumber by the nanosecond.
5. Tribe fans: Shut the F*** up already.
6. I love Rick Nash
7. The Stanley Cup Playoffs are the best in team sports.
8. Would the Scout troop leader that dropped off troop 619 please pick them up. They're leading the Reds 6-1 in the ninth.
9. Albert Pujols swing is the best thing about baseball.
10. Don Fehr and Bud Selig are the worst things in baseball.
11. Anyone that hates Wrigley Field has no soul.
12. I'm NEVER going to Huntington Park.
13. I'm not kidding about #12.
14. The NFL Draft: a waste of two days.
15. Cincinnati Bengals: a waste of four decades over 2 centuries.
16. Just having a PhD and 2 masters doesn't make you the smartest person at your own dinner table.
17. Any newspaper that fails to publish the NFL Master Schedule the day it comes out blows ass.
18. Harry Kalas: we'll miss you
19. Is it ok for me to want Jay "P***Y" Cutler to fail miserably?
20. How the F@#$ did the Mangini's get TWO primetime games?
21. We're at the halfway point and no A.Roid jokes yet. Oops...
22. it's the 50th Anniversary of the AFL and you know what that means? Ugly throwback jerseys. Except for the 619s.
23. How loud will Nationwide Arena be for game three against the Wings?
24. If you're the defending league champs in a sport people don't watch, does it count?
25. Here's a phrase for the 2009-10 NBA season. B.J. Mullens was sent to the D-league today...
26. How much do I love this phrase: 2009 National Champions, North Carolina Tar Heels?
27. Answer: A Lot...
28. Mike Commodore has the best hockey afro ever.
29. I love Steve Mason.
30. A few shows ago someone on our show predicted 65 Laker wins, oh wait that was me...
31. Who else is hoping for a Triple Crown winner this spring?
32. Does anybody still watch the Indy 500?
33. Tom Izzo is the best coach in the Big Ten, by a WIDE margin.
34. Sean Miller will miss Xavier before June 1st.
35. Hey Mini C: the Patron Gold, the fine Columbian do in fact make tonight a wonderful thing.
36. Ken Griffey Jr. looks great in that Mariners uniform.
37. A.J. Burnett is the ace in the Bronx
38. The phrase last place Boston Red Sox warms my soul.
39. Greg Oden, Sam Bowie -- Sam Bowie, Greg Oden
40. What if Portland had taken Kevin Durant?
41. Oscar De La Hoya retired? Who cares?
42. And finally, Jackie, I hope that you Mr. Rickey and Mr. O'Malley are smiling together in heaven. You strength, courage and sacrifice will live forever.

2009-04-09

Joy of six: How the 2009 Tar Heels saved my inner fan

By Rob Havener

It took four long years and two days (1,463 days to be exact) to get back here. North Carolina is the National Champion for the fifth time and I'm, well, exhausted. The win over a tough well coached Michigan State squad was what I'd been looking for since that April night for years ago in St .Louis for years ago. Roy Williams recruited this bunch, coached them up and let their talent take them right where they wanted to go. The last six wins for the team that started the season atop the polls were thrilling. I don't mean like Scottie Reynolds going coast to coast for the win thrilling, it was different, and better

This Carolina team had one goal, get to the 313 and cut down the nets, period. Mob said on our College Hoop preview show that they'd go undefeated a perfect 41-0. I, on the other hand knew they'd have between three and five brain lock games and they did (BC, Wake, Maryland and FSU). Ty Lawson got hurt and they gave up the ACC tournament title to rest him and prep for the only part of the season that mattered. When the confetti rained down on Monday it was hard not to smile.

As a fan the 21st century started well for me: Yanks finish 3peat in 2000, Lakers 2000-02 and the Heels in 2005. Then, it just stopped. No championship parades, Sports Illustrated special editions and no championship t-shirts. It sucks when virtually all your friends are getting new championship gear. Look, I love all my teams for better or worse in plenty and in want, it's like a marriage. North Carolina Basketball is different for me. It's about my connection with my dad a North Carolina native (born in North Wilkesboro) and our love of the game. He doesn't take these things as seriously as I do (who could?) but I know he's happy too. Monday I was reminded of how good it feels to keep the faith. In a lot of ways I needed this more than Ty, Tyler, Danny, Wayne and the rest of the champs. I've been spoiled by my teams successes I admit it. As the clock wound down my buddy Merrill said "you deserve to celebrate", and I did by the way. Now all the bad losses, blown chances and wasted seasons lessons were put to good use. Now, Carolina is on top again. It feels great, WAY better than 2005. You know what else? I get to buy a new championship shirt. SWEET!

2009-03-30

What we learned from Elite 8 Sunday

By Rob Havener

Izzo is a MAN
Michigan State is GOOD (just like I said on the show)
Louisville isn't as good as we thought
OU and the 12 can kiss my ass
Ty Lawson equals wins
UK will win in the next 3 years if Calipari sacks up to coach in a REAL conference
Pitino will not forget this, look out in 2010
I love Jay Wright, he and Izzo make me look like a freakin' genius
UConn left the nets up
Nobody wants the job at UVA
If UNC doesn't win two more, the whole season was a waste...
And Roy KNOWS it
UConn vs. MSU will be a great coaching match up.
Scotty Reynolds vs. Ty Lawson... oh yeah...
60 games down three to go...

2009-03-29

Elite Eight - Day 1

By Rob Havener

What we learned on Saturday:

Calipari is going to have a SECOND program in trouble with the NCAA
Free throws WILL get you to the Final Four
I was right about Villanova
My man Kevin Carlson (Villanova alum) is smiling
Jamie Dixon should take the call from UK
Scotty Reynolds is the new Bryce Drew
Scotty Reynolds has ONIONS
Jay Wright is way cooler than you...
That I miss Bill Raftery already
UConn is automatic in Arizona
We're all sick of Rollie Massimino crowd shots. You beat Georgetown, we get it...
We all miss Ashley Judd crowd shots
Findlay played and won the best game on Saturday (game winner at the buzzer...check, UNDEFEATED season...check and mate bitches)
That there are 6 games left in a wild season
This time next week we'll have the final 2
And finally, I'm tired and going to bed

Enjoy Sunday

2009-03-28

Sweet Sixteen - Part 2

By Rob Havener

What we learned on Friday:

Louisville is bad ass
Anthony Grant REALLY wants an SEC job
Jermaine is no longer to be trusted as a source on coaching news
Izzo is what I said he was
Billy G. took the wrong job
I was right about B.J. Mullens (if Clips take him you can bow in my presence)
Carolina CAN D up
We won't have consecutive repeat champs
Syracuse can keep you from a perfect Elite 8
Oklahoma can win a big game
UConn could be in BIG trouble (with the NCAA)
Jim Calhoun Has bros in different area codes
That the next Kentucky coach BETTER win...FAST
24 and 10 from Hansbrough means more with 19 and 9 from Ty Lawson
And finally
That Dallas area cop's suck ass...

2009-03-26

Sixteen Is SWEET - Day 1

By Rob Havener

What we learned tonight:

Strayer and Marshall were right about Dook
Memphis is who we thought they were: 18-32 at the line, you deserve to lose.
They're free for a reason...
Pitt is glad there are no style points in basketball
Levance Fields has...ONIONS
Villanova is good: just like we said on the Rob and Mob show...in January
Dook was overrated
Missouri is good
UConn is impervious to distractions
Billy Gillespie is screwed
Xavier is one baller away from the final 8, 4, 2,
Kentucky should call Sean Miller or Anthony Grant
Vern Lundquist wants to be left at the 16th at Augusta forever
If he is I'll go visit
B.J. Mullens is a wasted scholarship enjoy Clipperville you f****** scrub
The best 2 days of the tournament are when your team wins it all...
and when Dook loses. Au revoir chiens (goodbye bitches for those of you who don't speak French)
4-0 is a good thing...

2009-03-23

Random Thoughts Day 4 2009 NCAA Tournament

By Rob Havener

What did we learn on Sunday?

That Siena has more heart AND game than Wake Forest AND Clemson combined
That Coach K should shut his mouth because the Big East IS better
Arizona (!!!) is the only double digit seed left. Imagine if they had bothered to ball all season...
That Pitt is the top seed most likely to go home before Saturday
Villanova will be playing 5 on 8 as the refs will be kissing Coach Ks' polish ass
That Izzo is doing what I said he would
That Purdue is tremendous with Robby Hummel, what if he'd been healthy all year?
Missouri vs. Memphis will be a fistfight in a phone booth
Carolina better be very afraid of Gonzaga...
How good would Wisconsin be if they played a little more up tempo?
Which Coach will figure out the late game foul when you're down 3 first and use it for the win?
Is THIS the real UConn?
How much do you Syracuse right now?
How much fun will THIS weekend be?
If you're in two pools, and you have 27 of a possible 32 still playing, are you rollin' or is that just me?
Wait...It IS me….
See you on the next show...

2009-03-23

Committee got it right, and Woods still Woods

By Terry Brown, Senior Contributor

Certainly there were a few exciting moments in the first two rounds of this years NCAA Tournament...a couple of high seeds had close finishes...and some competitive games. But other than the Midwest #13 Cleveland State win over #4 Wake Forest, nothing really earth shattering to comment on. There is no Providence, or George Mason, or Davidson crashing the party this year and I simply cannot subscribe to the thought of Arizona being a Cinderella.

Now before you go screaming about how East #1 Pitt (those dudes are huge) almost got beat by a #16, or Midwest #9 Sienna almost beat #1 Louisville...the key phrase is "almost"...so shut-up. Scoreboard is everything in March and with teams playing on neutral sites, under those conditions, anything can happen. That's the madness. So just win and advance...it's all that matters. Still...some of you are going to chirp about "upsets" because some of the lower seeds won. So...lets examine those:

First...I will not entertain any "upset" discussion regarding an 8-9 game, for that is the very definition of a "Pick Em", so put that Texas A&M stuff away right now. We could have an "upset" discussion about the West Region #10 Maryland over #7 Cal. But we all know the Pac-10 was WEAK, and Gary Williams gets it done as well as anyone. Finally, before you go overboard about South #5 Illinois losing to #12 W KY...you should have had that pick all the way. Any bracketologist worth their salt knows that history will show a #12, especially when they are a Conference Champion over a 5 is a very predictable "upset".

As for the Ohio State debacle, the fact that they lost at UD arena....60 miles from home, could make that an upset...but I'll leave that for Rob, and definitely Mob, to expand upon!!

I would simply say that the tournament so far resembles this year overall. There are definitely teams who could win it all, but no clear favorite, and no real surprises. Even with the excitement in the Midwest, 14 of the top 16 seeds advanced. So we'll see who makes it to Detroit. But for now...it seems to me the Selection Committee got it right.

Speaking of Detroit, who are the geniuses who chose that glorious destination. To quote Clark Griswold in "Vacation" "...kids...are you taking in all this plight...?"

If you are not watching the Hank Haney-Charles Barkley show on Golf Channel, you are missing out. Hank has made two comments that I think are very profound. The first is in regard to Chucks swing. He says, "...It's not in his head...it is in his swing!" Most of you should take note of that. I cannot tell you how many people tell me about how they cannot hit a driver...or I cannot do this. Take note of that quote...accept that it is a much harder game than you think...and go take some lessons from a professional. You want it to be in your head, but It is in your swing.

The other quote went something like this: "...I work with Tiger Woods...so nothing amazes me anymore..."

That captures the essence of what makes Tiger so much better that the rest. The amazing becomes the standard. As the PGA Tour says..."Those Guys Are Good"... but the man is unbelievable. With golf, if you take 8 days off, you can easily lose the feel for putting, or wedges, but a bit of diligence on the range and it comes back quickly. Take 8 weeks off and you have more of a challenge. Take 8 plus months off and add a couple of surgeries while you're at it and one may never be the same player. But then again...we are talking about Tiger, who actually may not even be human.

His first official event, the World Match Play Championships, he opens with an Eagle and a Birdie and wins his first match. Are you kidding me? Then he follows that up with his first stroke play event in 9 months...top 80 players in the world, and he finished in the Top Ten (9) while shooting 11 under...at DORAL!!!

I think Nike hits it solid in their commercial that has a bunch of the tour players who have won since Tiger has been off, laughing it up in the locker room....Then he walks in, and they all get this sad look on their face, and quickly leave the room. That my friends is truly art imitating life. So I know PM certainly is playing well. But before you Phil Fanatics get too excited about him being close to #1 in the world...remember...Tiger was out for almost 9 months...and he still could not catch him!!!

One final thought. Last fall I said Lance Kiffin was a punk...and if you have been paying attention, you will note that he certainly has held up his end of the bargain.

2009-03-22

Random Thoughts Day 3 2009 Tournament Edition

By Rob Havener

What we learned on Saturday:
8-0 tastes GOOD
UConn is fierce
So is Villanova
UCLA, not so much
If it's March and you're playing Gonzaga, be prepared for a little tourney magic
Blake Griffin might have to start throwing hands
Blake Griffin will cost OU a game with missed free throws
Ty Lawson is the best player on the 2009 Tar Heels PERIOD
Never run smack to Memphis if you were lucky to make the field, Maryland we're looking at you.
Dook fans still suck
Rick Barnes does too
That if Texas could grab and hold late Dook would be done for the year
That the big boys brought their A Game today…BIG TIME
Gonzaga has a WAY better shot to beat NC next week than people think (gulp)
Villanova is so good, that they will beat Pitt if they both get to the 8
The winner of Syracuse vs. Arizona State will beat OU
That a MAJOR single digit seed is getting planted Sunday

Stay Tuned...

2009-03-21

Random Thoughts Day 2, 2009 NCAA Tournament Edition

By Rob Havener

Here's what we learned Friday:
Wake Forest is who we thought they were
That Pitt is the weakest 1 seed
That beyond UNC and Duke, the ACC just might be ASS
Thad Matta needs a hug
B.J. Mullins has NO GAME. Yet he'll shake hands with David Corleone in June in a Clippers hat.
Evan Turner on any other team, is playing next weekend
That you should just go ahead and take all the 12 seeds (3-1)
That Syracuse is badass
Wisconsin may not be flashy, but they are, in fact, clutch
That the 3 o'clock window was sleep inducing
That watching 14 hours of games and highlights is a great Friday.
That waking up at 5:45 a.m. after 14 hours of hoops sucks ass
That listening to Vern Ludquist and Bill Raftery is pure joy…ONIONS
Overtime in March is the best
That if you're 28-4 in one pool and 27-5 in the other is kick ass
And one last thing, at least we won't hear Rocky Top again until football season

Enjoy Round 2.

2009-03-20

Let the Madness Begin: 2009 Tournament Day One

By Rob Havener

After the first day of wall to wall NCAA Mens Tournament action here's what we know:
The 16 seeds are still winless against the 1s.
Mob is partying like a rock star in Vegas.
No Jim Calhoun, no problem for UConn.
That Villanova loses in any other city yesterday. I have to give big props to the Wachovia Center crowd. Outstanding, you came up HUGE.
Tyler Hansbrough passed Jerk off Jackass Redick for the ACC all time leading scoring record. I think we should stop the Hansbrough for ACC God stuff. Al McGuire said it best; never mistake statistical achievement for greatness.
Clemson is, in fact who we thought they were, STINK.
Western Kentucky is this best team in the bluegrass state, not named Louisville.
I guess UCLA can D up when it counts, Collins STONING Eric Maynard at the end of the VCU game was So Cal STRONG.
Eric you should've passed, Damn it!!!!
Memphis, maybe play hard for, oh I don't know, 40 MINUTES, this is the Dance, not punk ass C-USA.

Now a couple questions:
How many people who have Oklahoma going all the way straight shit themselves when Blake Griffin got slammed?
Anthony Grant knows he can't take that time out back to VCU right?
Hey Time Warner, we already don't have the NFL Network, now no multicasting for the first round? I speak for all hoop junkies when I say F*** YOU.

Enjoy day 2.

2009-03-09

Random thoughts: The Madness edition

By Rob Havener

"...So go on let it be.
Oh there's a feeling coming
over me. I can feel it in
The air feeling' right this
Time of year."
This Time Of Year, Better Than Ezra

So here we are, on the cusp of the 2009 NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament. If
the tournament has taught me anything is that each one is like a snowflake. I could sit here and give you 35,000 words on the 1991 tournament alone. I've been thinking a lot about little things with this tournament. Julius Caesar had the Ides of March, I have my little Madness details. These are things that will tell you if your team has a snowballs chance Flagstaff on cutting down the nets in the 313 (Detroit).

Beware the long winning streak: There's a reason that it's been 33 years since an undefeated team has won this tournament. A long winning streak adds pressure to an already pressurized situation.

Nets: If you're a power program don't cut down the nets at the Regional site. In 1991, North Carolina cut the nets down, and promptly lost to Kansas in the National Semi. It actually had a carryover effect. In 1992 the Tar Heels lost to Ohio State in the Sweet 16. In 1993, the won the East regional and left the nets up. They won the National Championship ten days later.

T-Shirts: If you're a fan of a power program DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE buy a conference or regional championship t-shirt. In 1989, I bought the UNC ACC tournament championship t-shirt. The Heels lost to Michigan in the 16. My best friend, a Michigan fan didn't buy the regional shirt; Michigan beat Seton Hall 80-79.

The Havener Late Season Loss Corollary: If a tournament favorite loses in its conference tournament it can be a good thing. In 1991, Duke got run out of the ACC final and then won back to back NCAA titles. In 1993, Georgia Tech upset UNC; UNC won their next six and a title. Since 1993, six NCAA champs North Carolina ('93,'05), Arkansas ('94), Kentucky ('96), Maryland ('02) and Syracuse ('03) didn't win their conference tournament title.

Just some things to keep an eye on……

2009-03-05

Who You Got? An Early NCAA Bracket Primer

By Rob Havener

I've been watching College Basketball for more than 30 years now (wow) and have never seen a season like this. It seems like 2009 has plenty of good teams, but no clear cut favorite for everyone else to target. One thing is certain; somebody is cutting down the nets in Detroit on Monday April 6th. And we can all take solace in the fact the no computer, polls or dumbass tiebreaker system is going to mess this up. With that said, here are my thoughts on some teams sure to make the field of 65 and be popular in the pool you're getting into.

Pitt: Who are these guys? Are they the team the bitch slapped UConn or the tem that got punked by Providence?

Oklahoma: Blake Griffin is a man, spelled M-A- N, not b-o-y. (Thanks Muddy) Who else do they have?

Memphis: Haven't we seen this movie before? At least when Tark was running the Big West through the floorboards he had the decency to win a title. This team is SCARY on the defensive end, maybe the best in the country, but can they close out on the big stage against someone there own size?

Dook: Seriously, how is this team STILL in the top ten? If any other team had cratered like they did last month, they'd project as a DOUBLE DIGIT seed, as of now they're on the 2 line. This team, a 2 seed NO FREAKIN' WAY.

UCLA: What happened to the D in Westwood? See what happens when you struggle in conference and the media doesn't sweat your coach?

Villanova: Every time I think they're out, they pull me back in. I have a hoop crush on these guys. They have good guards, good coaching and a great conference pedigree. I just think something is missing.

North Carolina: They may be one of the two most talented teams (along with Memphis). They will not win the title unless Roy gets the boys to sack up and play defense. If that happens, party on Franklin Street.

Michigan State: The ass whuppin at the hands of UNC not withstanding, this has been a consistent team all season. I love Tom Izzo, but they are a Big Ten team.

Wake Forest/Clemson: Both real good, undefeated outside the ACC, neither team gets to Detroit.

Marquette: They might have the best set of tournament tools: good on D, experienced guards great conference pedigree, but they struggle with heavyweights.

Louisville: Good team, good coach gets tight against good teams.

Kansas: The champs are making a HUGE run down the stretch, but they don't have Calipari to b ail them out this year

So what's it all mean? That's easy; the 2009 tournament is going to be a gamblers blood bath. Good Luck.

2009-03-05

Home Court Advantage? Not At the Corners of Olentangy and Lane

By Rob Havener

Mob and I went to the Ohio State 70-68 loss to Illinois loss on the 22nd. I've been going to OSU home games since the Granville Waiters era and let me tell you something, I miss St. John Arena. I mean sure it was old, cramped, small and outlived it's time as a revenue generator for OSU. However, the old barn was one thing the replacement isn't, LOUD.

I was at St. John in 1993 for the last trip the Fab 5 made here and my ears rang for two days. With that spirit in mind, I've compiled a list for the game day operations staff to make the Singer Center (think sewing machines) a real Home court advantage.

Lose the "Host": Who the hell is the jerk with the mike that comes out during timeouts? He's a toolbox and has to go.
No Dudes on the Dance Squad: It's Laker Girls for a reason.
Students ONLY in the lower bowl: The kids make ALL the noise.
Play Hells Bells during the whole TV timeout: since that's the only way the crowd makes noise.
No Cheesy Giveaways: just announce the free brat section and move on.
Free Towels should be scarlet or gray: white ones look like surrender rags and we ain't FRENCH!

The crowd for Illinois was AWFUL, just plain terrible. A young team needs, no, has to have the crowd. It needs that energy in key moments. The lack of energy in the building is both sad and alarming. The NBA defections of Mattas' best recruits hurt not only the team, but the fans too. OSU hoops aren't used to losing that kind of talent every year. I'll say this though, if, and this is a big if, this team stays together the Singer Center will rain down a scarlet colored hell on every road team that hits the floor. Until then it's the worst venue in the history of basketball.

2009-02-23

Finally.....something to talk about

By Terry Brown, Senior contributor

Superbowl Recap:
I love the Cardinals.
I hate the Steelers.
The better team won.
The commercials were lacking.
Faith is hot but I'm not sold on the new hair cut.
Jennifer Hudson did well.
The Boss is who we thought he was.

They played golf on Super Bowl weekend as well. Kenny Perry won in a playoff over green glove and two-tone green shoes wearing Charley Hoffman...but who cares. That show is all about Booze, Babes, and the perfect weather in the glorious Valley of the Sun. If the FBR Phoenix Open is not on your list of must attend sporting events you need to get a new list.

Feb. 2 was Groundhog Day...and one report said Phil predicted six more weeks of winter...and another said we might be in for a few more years of Bob Knight on the sidelines. Which causes more groans?

Just shy of a year ago a somewhat weary looking Bob Knight finally stepped down, wins record in hand. Seemingly content to be moving on to hunt, fish, and play with the grandkids. Knight haters everywhere rejoiced...and then went on to criticize him for leaving mid-season.

Then...just when they thought it was safe...the "world wide leader" came calling. Dandily clad in a rainbow of sweaters amidst a sea of suits, he quickly made the set his own, in the same manner as he made the court his own. Again, many criticize him for wardrobe, rather than applauding him for his pointed insight.

Now that studio role has been expanded to Color Analyst for games. A role defined in recent history by the very colorful likes of Packer, Vitale, Kellogg, and Raftery. But rather than emulate the flashy vocabulary, and identifiable tag lines, he once again is doing it his way. Frank descriptions that place the action, and the strategy in a context that transcends hype. And yes still wearing the sweaters, as does his play-by-play man Brent Musburger.

So will he coach again? I hope so because I think the good far outweighs the bad, or the more precisely the past. I think either program with an opening in the SEC would benefit from his presence, as will the numerous programs who will inevitably fire their coach in the coming months. If not, let's hope he keeps calling games. And if you quit hating him long enough to listen to what he has to say, you might just learn there is more to the game than "PTP dunker-do's" and "man-to-man."

But who am I kidding? Those who hate him are not inclined to change their minds. But before the haters...or The Herd grazers...start with petitions and bringing up tired references and faded video...take a look at the current Indiana Hoosier program. You will find they are now on their third coach, saddled with numerous NCAA violations, and without a single victory in conference play. None of which ever came close to applying to the program under Knight.

Finally....remember when it was a crime to not pay your taxes?

They say patriotism is the last refuge.
To which a scoundrel clings.
Steal a little and they put you in jail.
Steal a lot and they make you a king.

Bob Dylan, "Sweetheart Like You", Infidels (1983)

2009-01-30

My story: The Vince Lombardi Trophy

Editor's note: This was Rob's submission for the Super Bowl 40 commercial. He missed the deadline by 5 minutes. He explains the spot on the next epidsode of the show.

As told by Rob Havener

When the NFL and AFL got together to play for me I didn't have a name, but neither did the game. The World Championship Game, right. Those first two games were whuppins. A year later, the game and I had our breakthrough moment. Lamar Hunt came up with Super Bowl, and a brash kid from a Pennsylvania mining town made a guarantee. On game day the scoreboard told the story, Jets 16- Colts 7. The Kid delivered, and an unofficial holiday was born. After coach Lombardi died in 1970, they named me after him and the Colts were the first team to win me under the new name. Now, the game and I are part of an annual spectacle.

You know, in the first forty two of these games we've seen dynasties, domination, history, perfection and heartbreak. Hell, if I were that Norwood kid, I'd never sleep .If you win me it cements your career, ask Elway. If you lose it means your whole year meant nothing. So sit back and enjoy my day.

Welcome to Super Sunday.

2009-01-28

Rob's random thoughts

By Rob Havener

As the world awaits the dawn of the Obama Administration (no pressure dude),
I feel like it's time to address some things I've been thinking about.

College Football: Since we're NEVER getting a playoff system I'll fix what we have. If you have a league title game, the BCS is NEVER allowed to settle conference tie breakers. In fact all multiple team tie breakers will use the NFL format (see my last piece for the list). The Three conferences without championship games must play EVERYONE in the conference. Allow me to make myself clear, no more non-league games against Youngstown State, Troy or OU. (OK, one but after that your other non-conference games better be a FBS HEAVYWEIGHT.) So, all you Big 10 schools will be playing 10 conference games and if ND doesn't want to join then f--- 'em. The bowl season will begin on or around December 20th with the BCS title game no later than January 5th. We will also be cutting back to 20 bowl games. To be eligible for a bowl you must be at least 7-5 against FBS teams, no exceptions. Here is the new list of bowls:

BCS Championship Game
Rose
Orange
Sugar
Fiesta
Cotton
Outback
Gator
Capital One
Chick –Fil-A
Alamo
Sun
Holiday
Las Vegas
Hawaii
New Orleans
Independence
Motor City
Music City
Texas
The rest of you thanks, now go away.

Baseball Hall Of Fame: Everyone that didn't vote for Rickey Henderson, Tony Gwynn or Cal Ripken, you voting rights are herby revoked, ASSHOLES.
Hockey: This one is easy, fire Gary Bettman.
Basketball: For the love of God, call the walk, please…..
Rosenhaus, T.O. and 85: Just shut up. NOW!!!!
And finally, I'll say this. I've said a LOT of bad things about Miles Brand. On Saturday he announced he has pancreatic cancer. Here's hoping his treatment goes well.

2009-01-24

Bucks new dance: The Thad Three-Step

By Jeremy Lynch

I know it's only late January, but the Buckeyes are already dancing. And if they continue this dance much longer, the only dance they'll be doing in March is defending their NIT "title." The dance I'm referring to is what I like to call the "Thad Three-Step." It goes something like this: one step forward, two steps back.

I know that OSU had two decent wins in the non-conference season, beating Miami on the road in the ACC-Big Ten Challenge and a neutral-site win over a then top-10 Notre Dame team. Looking back, OSU was given a little to much credit for those wins. Miami's best player, Jack McClinton, was ejected with 10 minutes remaining in the first half, and Notre Dame was overrated. If you don't believe the latter, I have two words for you....St. John's.

So the non-conference part of OSU's schedule was a step forward. Well, most of it. The last part, a home game with West Virginia, was like two steps back. Not only was OSU unbeaten at the time, they were ranked 13th in the country. The Mountaineers routed the Buckeyes by 30 points — the largest home defeat ever under Thad Matta. One step forward, two steps back.

The Buckeyes then recover to win their Big 10 opener against Iowa, but backed that up wtih road losses to Minnesota and Michigan State. One step foward, two steps back.

Wins over Indiana and Houston Baptist, you read that correctly, don't count as anything other than scrimmages. However, a road win against an improving Michigan club (ranked No. 24 at the time) is a step forward. But to go on the road and lay an egg in Champaign and follow that up with what should be a blowout loss at home to Michigan State will be more of the same. One step forward, two steps back.

Looking at OSU's remaining schedule (with my prediction in parentheses), it could be more of the same:

TSUN (W), at Indiana (W), Purdue (L), Minnesota (L), at Wisky (L), at Northwestern (L), Illinois (L), Penn State (W), at Purdue (L), at Iowa (L), Northwestern (W).

Now, I'm sure I'll be wrong on some of these, but I should be around the ballpark. And by my calculation, that works out to a 17-12 record. OSU could always make some noise in the Big 10 tournament, but it's not likely. And despite the conference's overinflated RPI ranking, the Buckeyes won't have done enough to get into the Big Dance. But hey, look at it this way: the Thad Three-Step will allow Matta's streak of consecutive 20-win seasons to continue thanks to the Not Invited Tournament.

2009-01-08

A little something about BCS conference tiebreakers

By Rob Havener

After Texas got jobbed out of its shot to kick the hell out of Missouri in the Big 12 Championship game, I said on the show I'd find a better tiebreaker. What I found was the BCS conferences all have TERRIBLE systems for multi team tiebreakers. The ACC, SEC, Big East, Pac 10 at least takes into account on field performance. The Big Ten has the team with the longest title drought provision in its tiebreaker. The Big East has a chance to send a team to the BCS based on poll (not BCS) ranking. I think we can all agree that the BCS rankings should NEVER settle conference championship game berths.

Now before I continue, Mark in Worthington was right to take me to the woodshed for not clarifying my multi-team tiebreaker point. So, with that said I looked at the BCS affiliated leagues 3 team tiebreakers and saw (wait for it) no uniformity. So I did what I thought was the best thing. I went to the top of the football food chain — the NFL — and ran the Big 12 South through the NFL 3 team Tiebreaker. Here are the facts:

The NFL Tiebreaker is as follows:
1) head-to-head
2) Division winning percentage
3) Winning percentage common games
4) Winning percentage conference games
5) Strength of victory (winning percentage of defeated teams)
6) Strength of schedule
7) Best combined ranking among conference teams in pts. scored and pts. allowed
8) Best combined ranking among all teams in pts. scored and pts. allowed
9) Best net points in common games
10) Best net points in all games
11) Best net touchdowns in all games
12) Coin toss

The coin toss is used after tiebreakers lead to final two teams and it gets that far. The three-way tie in the Big 12 South got to step 5, Strength of victory.

The strength of victory numbers went as follows:
Oklahoma: defeated teams with a combined .524 winning percentage.
Texas: defeated teams with a combined .522 winning percentage.
Texas Tech: defeated teams with a combined .422 winning percentage.

So that eliminates Tech, and allows us to now use head-to-head to decide. Based on their 45-35 win in Dallas, Texas should have been playing Missouri and maybe in the BCS Title Game.

2009-01-03

Big 12 defenses are soft, but don't expect OSU win

By Jeremy Lynch

The meaningless bowl season has helped clear up a few things. First, there is no question that the Little, er, Big Ten is as bad as we thought and should be removed from the BCS (being replaced by the Mountain West). Secondly, we now know that the Big 12 South offenses were so good because the defenses were so bad.

That being said, I don't want to hear any noise about how Ohio State has a chance against Texas in the Tositos Fiesta Bowl. In fact, I think OSU's pathetic offense coupled with the lack of a pass rush from their front four will allow Colt McCoy to do whatever he wants as the Longhorns rout the Buckeyes by at least 20.

But keep the faith OSU homers. Things wouldn't change if OSU pulls off the upset. Tress would continue to try and confuse defenses with spread looks only to run the ball up the middle. And Jim Heacock would continue not trust the talent he has on the field playing soft zone defenses until his assistant Luke Fickell gets so frustrated that he jumps out of the press box.

Instead, the Buckeyes will be embarrassed, again, on national television and things will have to change or the program will never again be relevant. I doubt even Tressel thinks he can continue with his current philosophy of punt and play defense and still go into homes and land top-notch offensive recruits. And if he does think what he's doing is working, he'll get what he deserves....a pink slip. Why? I can give you 3.4 million of them.

2008-12-16

The Thads impressive thus far, but still have questions

By Jeremy Lynch

Note to Mark C.: Just another rant from a "loud mouth, opinionated, probably wanna be but never was anything type of guy with a keyboard and an internet connection"...

The Thads are off to an impressive 6-0 start that has landed them in the Top 25. The Buckeyes even have a couple of quality wins on their resume: a road win against then No. 22 Miami and a neutral-site win over then No. 5 Notre Dame. So the rise up the charts is justified. I'm just afraid this team's inability to put the ball in the hole is going to cost them a few winnable games. And that could go a long way toward determining if the Buckeyes go dancing in March or have to settle for trying to defend their NIT "title."

Take OSU's next opponent, Jacksonville, for example. A should win, but no gimme. This is a team that is 2-5, but a closer examination of their schedule says that the Thads will have their hands full come Wednesday night. The Dolphins lost to Florida State at home by two (59-57), Georgetown on the road by nine (71-62), Baylor in Waco by 8 (76-68), Georgia Tech in Atlanta by three (79-76). They have won two straight including a win over Belmont, a team that was a three-pointer away from upsetting Duke last season in the first-round of the NCAA tournament. The 'Phins can ball and if the Buckeyes think they can rely solely on their matchup zone defense to win games, they are mistaken. Improving their 42 percent FG percentage, 31 percent 3-point FG percentage and 68 percent FT percentage will go a long way in relieving the stress on their defense.

This is the get fat and happy portion of the schedule, with games against Iona and UNC-Asheville coming up before Huggy Bear and the boys from Morgantown (West Virgina) roll into the Fred Taylor Center, er, Value City Arena. I'd like to see OSU find another scorer before the Big Ten season starts, as conference teams won't let Evan Turner beat them. It's hot hard to see that Ohio State misses John Groce, the former assistant coach now at Ohio University. He was the brains behind the Xs and Os and, at times, it's painfully obvious his clipboard and dry-erase marker are missed.

I have been pleasantly surprised by Dallas Lauderdale's development as a defensive presence in the lane. That will allow B.J. Mullens to ease his way into more playing time and eventually will give OSU two quality bigs. I'm still worried, however, about the point guard situation. Jeremie Simmons is a shot-first kind of player, and the offense struggles to find consistency when he's on the floor. Anthony Crater brings a defensive toughness and is a better floor general than is Simmons, but doesn't have the range that his backcourt counterpart possesses. I'm guessing that they will split time for most of the year, as their differences bring a certain versatility to the lineup, even if offensive flow is hard to come by.

The Little Eleven is deeper this year, even if the top of the conference is weaker than in the past. Improvements by Minnesota, Northwestern and Illinois will make road wins more valuable and despite being a notch below last season, Michigan State and Purdue will be tough no matter the venue. So consistency will be key for this young Buckeye team. The sooner they find some on the offensive end, the sooner they will announce their arrival as a threat to win the conference and make a run in their dancing shoes.

2008-12-11

BCS got it right...except for Ohio State

By Terry Brown, Senior contributor

I still think the BCS got the rankings mostly right....we can argue over Texas and Bama for days...but regardless...as we see the final rankings has nothing to do with bowl match-ups.

So I ask...can a case be made that the BCS is guilty of Extortion? I ask because every year -- when we discuss match-ups -- the same irritating, and I might add irrelevant, phrase keeps working it's way into the conversation:

"Well...they travel well!"

What in the hell does that mean? Well I am no lawyer, but let's see if we can build the case of Extortion for Perfect Ten.

This is not a remake of the epic foray into a man's obsession with attaining a trophy...err...woman. Or is it? Now it should be mentioned that our devotion to the beloved Bo Derek remains and visions of her flowing corn-rows forever reign in the hearts and minds of us all. However, this is an expose of the BCS and their obsession with Ohio State. A detailed account of how the BCS flagrantly bypassed #7 and #9, and then forced them into College Bowl obscurity to maintain their silence. This is about the BCS and their quest for the Perfect #10, and their well-traveled alum.

Exhibit A: #3 Texas v. #10 Ohio St. Ah...even if they do not play well...the Buckeye faithful travel well as they always seem to supply the necessary contingent of adult males in jean shorts and ill-fitting jerseys spending money on adult beverages during their extended stay at whatever destination the BCS chooses. They get pounded at USC...and thumped by PSU....so my money is on UT completing that trifecta.

"Honey....we are going to that new Outback in Scottsdale tonight...so did you pack my good jean shorts? And where is my jersey....what....no...not that one..it has stadium mustard on the sleeve...I need the good one...the Maurice Clarett jersey with the Fiesta Bowl patch on the shoulder. And where is my weaved leather belt?

Exhibit B: #7 Texas Tech...apparently the BCS sees them as the runt of the Big 12 South litter and summarily punked them out of a BCS bid. But not to worry for the Red Raiders will get a quality opponent when they play....wait for it...#25 Ole Miss. in the Forgotten Bowl. Apparently the folks in Lubbock are in need of an agent...err....travel agent! Your honor...please!!!

Exhibit C: #9 Boise State...you can catch them on Dec. 23rd in the San Diego County Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl. Imagine the patch on those jerseys. Your honor I move for an immediate ruling.

In the remaining BCS Bowls....SC rolls as usual, no one will watch Utah handle the Tide, and Florida avenges the 62-24 pounding they took at the hands of Tommie Frazier and the Sooners in the January 2, 1996 Fiesta Bowl. Make sure to TEBO that one.

2008-12-03

Mad as hell, and not taking it anymore

By Rob Havener

I thought we had gotten past the point where one conference could take a big giant dump on the ENTIRE season. Guess what? I was wrong. For the third time in the 11 seasons that comprise the history of the BCS, the damn Big 12 will have a team in the National Championship game with NO BUSINESS near an HDTV that is showing the game. (Quick recap: 2001: Nebraska gets dump trucked 62-36, fails to win the big 12 North, plays for title and gets bitch slapped by Miami, 2003 Oklahoma gets DESTROYED by Kansas State, loses 21-14 to LSU. 2008: OU loses 45-35 to Texas, somehow leapfrogs a team that whipped it's ass to play in Big 12 title game AND most likely the big show in Miami.)

So here's the deal, I'm officially finished with Big 12 football. Any organization ON EARTH that allows the worst way to decide ANYTHING, EVER (read the BCS) decide your league champion (you know Missouri has less than no chance) and half of the national title game, you just plain suck. This was a joke conference as the Big 8, and has somehow gotten worse. How in the hillbilly hell is HEAD-TO-HEAD COMPETITION not included in your tie-breaker system? There is NO WAY I can ever take this league seriously again. Goodbye and kiss my man-sized ass.

Mob feels like the Buckeyes will never win another title with the Vest. I disagree. I think Tressel's biggest problem is too much success, too soon. They had NO BUSINESS winning that 2002 title. It was a magic carpet ride that ended on my 30th birthday with a win Buckeye fans will savor from Friday January 3, 2003 until they die. Tress, my man you got some work to do though, 10-2 is great and all, but you had 18 starters back and really should be 11-1 and planning to go to the Clevelander....On South Beach feel me? Your 2009 resolution should be simple: cut the defense loose to kill and destroy and continue to develop TP.

I'm only gonna type this once. North Carolina is NOT going undefeated this season, but if it happens, cool. If you're a Heels fan you want a six-game win streak that ends in Ford Field with Roy and the boys cutting down the nets. Nothing else will be acceptable.

2008-11-29

OSU won't contend for another national title under Tress

By Jeremy Lynch

Forgive me if I don't give a rats ass that the overrated Buckeyes routed a horrible team from Ann Arbor. Yeah, it's always nice to get a win over TSUN, but it doesn't matter when the Buckeyes' offense failed to show up in the two games that DID mean something this season.

And now that I've gotten a chance to see several Big 12 and SEC games, I've come to only one conclusion: Ohio State will never again be relevant on the national stage as long as Jim Tressel is the head coach. Let that soak in.

The Buckeyes don't get the athletes they need to compete with the Big 12, SEC or any national power (i.e., USC). And if they do get the athletes, Tress and his staff doesn't use them correctly. Case in point: Ray Small, DeVier Posey and Lamaar Thomas are the best receivers/athletes on the team. None of them start and none of them return kicks on a regular basis. Gonna be hard to recruit the best athletes when you can't show any film of current players that you use in a variety of ways. And if you don't land receivers, how can you land quality quarterbacks? No passing game? No running backs are going to want to face 8- and 9-man fronts. But I digress.

I don't care how many conference titles OSU wins under Tressel. The Buckeyes will be viewed as soft until they can win games against the big boys. And they deserve that label. When OSU goes up against a highly-ranked, non-conference opponent, they get manhandled in the trenches, badly outcoached and the ugly outcomes are predictable.

Until Tress lets someone else call the offensive plays and gets rid of defensive coordinator Jim Heacock (who never saw a soft zone defense he didn't like), Buckeye fans should forget about national titles. Hell, conference titles are going to be hard to come by when you set college football back 30 years each time your team takes the field in a big game.

So for all you myopic OSU fans that think the Buckeyes are a national power, set down the special brownies that you are stuffing your pie hole with and come to grips with the fact the 2002 national title was the high point in the Tressel era and until OSU athletic director Gene Smith sacks up and shows The Vest the door, the program will be wasting $3.4 million dollars (Tressel's salary) each year.

2008-11-21

A down year would be putting it lightly

By Terry Brown, Senior contributor

A DOWN YEAR? That's is how this ride gets spun....then stop for I need to get off and vomit

I have sported the Maize and Blue amidst a sea of Scarlet and Gray for over 40 years...and I am here to tell you that a down year would be 8-4....7-5 at worst. This is an outright embarrassment to the traditions of the winningest program in the history of NCAA football, the Conference, the University...and the legacy of coaches that came...and will most assuredly follow this ass.

When Lloyd left...he said ..the fans,..the team, and the University deserve better. Well...at the expense of tradition and respectability...we are still waiting for better. Rodriguez has gone out of his way to make this "his program". Well...his program sucks. Without doubt Lloyd's time had come...he knew it as well as anyone else..and when he left...he admitted as much...but he did not leave the cupboard a bare as Rodriguez' inabilities have shown it to be. I guess it is simply not full of the criminals Rodriguez was used to at WVa.

This guy is a joke and wants to blame it on not having the "right type" of players. Bull shit!! Anyone can win with "great players"...great coaches win with the players they have. The Big Ten is not talented enough to warrant this record. But I guess rather than paying attention to his ineptness...I should simply ignore it. According to him I need to simply "...get a life..." No Rich...I think the more immediate need is to get a coach. Worst record ever!!! Where is Charlie Weiss when you need him?

Down year...indeed.

2008-11-04

Guns up, Brady under the gun, and just shoot Utley

By Terry Brown, Senior contributor

College pigskin
GUNS UP BABY!!! WOW...what a game!!! I told you this team is for real. So before you start with the PSU/Joe Pa nonsense...let me say one thing. SO WHAT?! The Red Raiders are No. 1 in three of the BCS contributing polls and No. 2 in another...PSU only ranks as high as No. 2 and that is only in one of those polls...including the AP!! So yes...at 81, Paterno certainly is on a nice run, but do not be surprised if PSU runs the table and still gets locked out.

With four teams from the Big 12 South in the BCS top 10...the Big 12 Championship could be the ultimate "trap game."

Even though there is a $500K endowment securing the tradition of the top WR at Michigan wearing the No.1 jersey, Rodriguez did not care. Now Rodriguez has ended another tradition. Playing in a bowl game!!! He has now seen to it that the Wolverines will not go to a bowl...for the first time since 1975!!! So as Ann Arbor suffers through it's own version of ABC's "Life On Mars", one has to wonder if the next tradition to go by the wayside under his watchful eye will be....those helmets? Now I know the program under Lloyd Carr was not up to standard, but the cupboard was not so bare as to warrant this record. Is this what Rodriguez meant by making the program his own?

Phil Fulmer is finally out at UT. In the SEC anything is possible....so if Saban can go to Bama....the you better believe Spurrier can got to Knoxville!!!

Pro pigskin
I heard someone say that the Packers made the right choice. Well so far the records are: NYJ 5-3...GB 4-4. I say Scoreboard!!

Remember the Dan Reeves commercial for Sure Deodorant. "Never let the press...pick your starting quarterback." Well...apparently in Cleveland they did just that...or rather...let the fans do it. Answering the chants for Brady, he will be at the helm versus Denver this week. Now...they play on Thursday...so why not make the change after that game when he has 10 days to get ready? Do you really think he can get ready on a short week?

Bigger question: Can Braylon Edwards learn to catch on a short week?

No...firing Lane Kiffin was not the wrong move. Just get a first down baby!!

How 'Bout Them Cowboys!!!!

Marvin says his team needs to focus on going 7-0 the rest of the way. Who is he kidding...they'll be lucky to score 7 points!!

MLB
Some men are great...and some have greatness thrust upon them. And then some are simply no-class idiots like Chase Utley of the "World “F****** Champs."

2008-10-24

Devil Rays, Winslow and the BCS

By Terry Brown, Senior contributor

I told you we love the Devil Rays!!! Why?...Because Mitch Lukevics, who headed up the Yankees scouting in the early 1990's and signed...among others...Derek Jeter...is heading up the Rays minor league operations. The Yankees have the new digs...but the Devil Rays have the new talent. Get ready for a similar run over the next five years.

Meanwhile...Brett Favre denied calling me this week...and telling me to get back to work...

I did not call Kellen Winslow either. If I had...I would have asked him if the reports that he actually complained...in public...about not being called by another grown man were true? If he actually said they treat him like a piece of meat. Then I would have asked him if my ex-girlfriend was his publicist...because he sounds just like her!! Hey idiot...did you feel like part of the team when they carried you and your mouth for the first two years?! Most pieces of meat would have been tossed long before then.

The BCS got it as correct this time as they could. Some say the top is overloaded with three teams each from the Big 12 and SEC in the top 8, but...SO WHAT!!! that is where the talent lies...and it does not take a genius to say that once again the title will go to one of those conferences. For those of you Pac 10 and Big 10 pretenders...I'll refer you once again to Oregon State.

Now...that said...where does that leave an undefeated Tulsa? I know...beating yet another underachieving Oklahoma team in a BCS bowl to once again stir the pot regarding the "non-power" conferences. As if the Big Ten is a "Power Conference"...

Joe Pa did not call me....but it has been rumored that he got an anonymous call that has been traced to a pay-phone at The Crossroads.

So you say you want a dark horse...well...the Dawgs till have a shot...but I love the Red Raiders..."Gun's Up"!! But actually...by dark horse you meant...what needs to happen for Ohio State to get in? Simple. They have to wait until next year.

How out of place does Wade Phillips look?

Kobe says he is hurting...again...but does he not always lower the expectations in pre-season .

Tiger is healing...and says he and his 85% ligament will be at the Masters.

A-Rod is vogueing...and Canseco is apologizing...and Michael Vick is about to plead guilty again....which do you think gets more press?

Oh yeah...Pete Carroll is not leaving USC for the 49ers.

2008-10-20

Win over TSUN Lite sets up big fall

By Jeremy Lynch

45-7. Not bad. A 38-point thrashing of a ranked opponent on the road. Even better. Did someone forget to mention that OSU didn't have one passing yard in the second half? Not one! Even when the Buckeyes rout a team it's by accident.

That game against Sparty should have been about a 10-point win. It was clear that McVest (a political jab) wanted to keep it close and not blow out his mentor, Mark Dantonio. Second-half game plan: No passing allowed and turn the defense back into a bunch of zone cupcakes. Does Tress understand how the system works? It's OK to rout inferior teams. Someone needs to tell Jim that winning a national championship by barely scraping by half the time by less than seven points only happens once....ever!

I shouldn't get all worked up because Penn State is going to come to C'bus and party like it's 1994. For those who aren't familiar, JoePoo and boys laid a 63-14 beatdown on the Bucks that year. It may not be that bad this time because the game in the Horseshoe, but it will be ugly. Wait, home field advantage doesn't exist at the 'Shoe. It's the most overrated place to play a college football game in the country. I've heard louder crowds at poetry readings...but I digress.

OSU will be exposed once again on the national stage for the fraud that they are. And Tress, Bollman and Heacock will be outcoached by a staff led by an 81-year-old! I find it funny that there are headlines in some newspapers that that say things like "OSU faces uphill climb", inferring the Buckeyes have a shot at getting into the national title game. Come late Saturday night, the Buckeyes won't even have a shot at winning the Little, er, Big 10 title.

2008-10-14

Wild weekend stirs the pot

By Rob Havener

This is the 11th season of the Bowl Championship Series and in only three Seasons (1999, 2002 and 2005) has the championship game matched up the two best teams. (Author’s Note: I was going to include 2004 but Auburn got JOBBED. I mean 14-0 in the SEC!!! Damn!!!!) At any rate, last weekends’ carnage leaves ten undefeated teams on the road to Miami and the BCS Title Game. Let’s break down our contestants.

No Shot Division

10. Tulsa: Conference USA? I don’t think so.
9. Ball State: I have unlimited love for Letterman’s’ alma mater, but it’s a MAC School.

BCS Busters Division

8. BYU: Undefeated against a BCS league (Pac 10), a good team but must beat...
7. Utah: Showdown looming with undefeated in state rival with a bid on the line.
6. Boise State: Smurfs know the way to a big payday.

Big Schools, Little Chance Division

5. Oklahoma State: Still have Texas Tech, OU, AND Texas
4. Texas Tech: Can defense hold up against Texas, OU, and Oklahoma State? No

Best Team In A League I Hate Division

3. Texas: Congratulations on beating OU, now you get Missouri, Texas Tech and Oklahoma State the next three weeks.

BCS Executive X-Rated Fantasy Division

2. Alabama: Has LSU and SEC Championship game left, that’s it.
1. Penn State: OSU and MSU between Lions and South Beach.

What’s it all mean? How does it play out? The little 12 goes SEC and cannibalizes itself and the champ has a loss. BYU and Utah play and undefeated showdown and the winner goes to the BCS. Boise State gets the BYU/ Utah loser in a bowl match up of non-BCS power schools.

Now here’s where it gets interesting. What if Alabama and Penn State win out? You get two tradition rich programs in the crowning event of the 2008 season, 30 years after Bear Bryant beat JoePa for the 1978 title. If Penn State wins JoePa rides off into retirement with a third national championship. (Although, the 1994 team got ROBBED. That was the best Penn State team EVER, and Nebraska fans, you KNOW you STOLE that title from JoePA.) If Alabama wins, Saban leaves for the Raiders.

The more likely scenario, everybody loses at least once and we get Florida and USC for the title. Would it be a great match up? Yes, but not quite Alabama/Penn State is it?

2008-10-14

Sunday pigskin still the king

By Terry Brown, Senior contributor

Tell me that you watched Texas vs. Oklahoma?!!

Saturday was good...but Sunday was even better. All the NFL had to offer this week was five games won on the final play!!! Those included three on field goals, one on a QB rushing touchdown...and the Cardinals blocking a Cowboy punt in overtime. Quite frankly I do not trust a man who does not watch the NFL.

So Tommy Bowden got fired...or resigned...or whatever. So What! Actually he got fired two years ago...but things just seem to move slower in the south. First of all, this ACC championship pipe dream was never going to happen since Clemson has not had a team worth discussing at length since the Danny Ford era. The truth is, Bowden's firing was set in stone...or The Rock as it were...once Spurrier got hired at SC. Maybe his old man can get him a job wearing the Garnet and Gold once he steps aside.

Speaking of the old man...don't look now Bobby..but Joe is 7-0 and on his way to the BCS.

The Romo injury has everyone talking...but frankly I'm already tired of talking about the Cowboys and their nonsense. Relax. He will only miss two weeks because they play the Giants week 9 before the bye and I am sure Romo will be under center for that one.

The big injury news is that of Big Brown. I love the Sport of Kings so I am in no way getting on a PETA tangent here. I understand the nature of the sport and the physics involved...but there has to be a solution to this rash of hoof injuries to the top horses.

The Browns are worth talking about. I'm not one to say I told you so....but ....I told you so. Did all of you fair-weather Brady Bunch posers forget that Derek Anderson suffered a concussion in the last pre-season game? That has to have had an effect on his performance. Add to that, Donte Stallworth strains his hammy warming up for the first game and misses the first five weeks. That allowed teams to play much tighter coverage on Edwards who, as you probably have forgotten, missed all of pre-season with a foot injury. All of this has obviously affected their timing and focus, but now that they are healthy, look what happens. Brady Quinn...please.

Speaking of I told you so's...anyone see Peyton and the Colts this weekend.

It's way too early to talk NBA...but it Derrick Rose is for real. Can a rookie win the MVP?

We love the Devil Rays.

Make sure to grab a doughnut at the Circleville Pumpkin Festival this week...it's the last big fiesta of the season!!

2008-10-03

Vijay wins FedEx Cup....does anyone care?

By Terry Brown, Senior contributor

Golf
Breaking News: In the wake of the Ryder Cup victory...the Fed Ex Cup and Tour Championship will not be...er....wait...this just in...my editors are telling me they actually did play those events...and they were actually on TV....and Vijay actually played in The TOUR Championship...could have fooled me...and NBC!I Despite it's anticlimatic circumtance...Sunday's round was full of excitement from Camillo Villegas...who showed up with a purpose...and fought his way through AK, Sergio, and Phil to actually make it exciting. and pocket a cool $4 million.

Apparently Vijay accept numerous awards in addition to the Fed-Ex Cup. Some of which you might have missed..so here is the recap:

Roger Maris Award goes to...Vijay Singh. Hey Vijay...with no Tiger...this one will always have an asterisk.

Mr. Irrelevant Award goes to...Vijay Singh. I wonder if Vijay noticed that most of Monday's headlines were about Camillo's victory, Camillo's SECOND place finish in the Cup, and his $4 million payday.

Bill Murray Motivational Award goes to...Vijay Singh. "It Just Doesn't Matter...It Just Doesn't Matter...It Just Doesn't Matter...because Vijay...you know as well as anyone that there was no Tiger Woods. You remember him don't you Vijay...he's the guy who only played in six tournaments...but still managed to finish second on the money list...and first in Fed-Ex qualifying points...and had not played since JUNE!!

College football
Let's be clear...Michigan is still bad....Oregon State is still bad...Ole Miss has always been bad...and Charlie Weiss is who we thought he was!!!

College football suffered an upset last week. We have seen weeks like this before, but in an era where we continue to debate the solution (without using the correct formula) credibility to the top tier programs and conferences is EVERYTHING. And in the wake of this past weekend, no conference has credibility...including the mighty SEC. Georgia got punked between the hedges by the Tide and Florida loses to Ole Miss. Of course...the party got started out west when USC gots their perennial bitch slap from a second tier conference foe. All tolled 9 teams lose...6 to unranked opponents. That inevitably opened the floodgates for the OSU faithful (waning as they are) to complain because they failed to move up. Short term memory loss is a blessing at times but let's get something straight...you almost lost to OU at home...and thanks to USC's loss...in everyones minds you got it handed to you by Oregon State as well. Take your top 15 and be happy.

To all of you I say...relax. We have been through this before and soon enough things will settle in and the top teams will rise to the top. However, opinions are all we have in college football, so we will inevitably spend then next three months debating polls and conferences. After all is said and done...there will be two certainties; everyone wondering how an undefeated BYU got jobbed by not being invited to the Championship game...and why is Notre Dame playing in a bowl.

NFL
What?...Aaron Rodgers is hurt?...and that is surprising? I am amazed he got through three games. Is it just me or can everyone tell when a guy is just not the right guy. It's like when you see those pics of people with their pets...that look just like them. Aaron Rodgers is not a Packer. I know he tries to grow the beard and look all northern tough guy...but to me he looks more like a Chiefs backup. For those of you who actually engaged in Favre- Rodger's debate....please. Farve is the Man.

Speaking of posers...the Heisman variety...where in the world is Matt Leinert?...and what is up with Vince Young? Can anyone say Ryan Leaf?

Matt Schaub...really?...still?...we are going with Matt Schaub?...and he's getting how much? Kubiak is out at the end of this year.

You know that rush you get when the GED'd cashier gives you change for a $20 and you only gave her a $10...you think about keeping it for a second...but unless you are a complete loser...most of us realize that it is ill-gotten gain...and you help them out by giving it back. Well...Al Davis may be senile...but Lane Kiffin is deservedly out of Ray-duh nation. I know...he was offered the job...but so what. He owed it to those players, the organization, and himself to man up and say..you know what....I am not ready for this. The guy is a punk and had no business accepting an offer to coach in the NFL. He could not even get an additional interview to coach the Minnesota Golden Gophers.

By the way...how does Marvin Lewis keep his job?

Mrs. Palmer (sternly to her son): "Carson....I'm not telling you again...either you take your brother Jason to play with you...or you can stay home!!"

Speaking of the Bungles...watch Rudi Johnson as he lights it up now that he is in Detroit (run the) Rock City

The Patriots are lost without Giselle.

Let's put Brady Quinn in...yeah...that's the answer...in bizarro world. By the way Brady...we know you got your hair styled...so put on a ball cap and shut up. Also...quit waiting at the sideline with your arms folded to make your guns look big...posing like you are real leader. Hey Brady...I see the Chiefs need a #3...

Jason Witten is the best receiver on the Cowboys.

And for all you fantasy guru's...if you have even remotely considered trading Peyton...can I still join your league?

2008-09-30

Much trepidation in the 614

By Rob Havener

Here is Have's response to Mob's rant (scroll down to see):

I have watched OSU football my entire life, and haven’t seen a team this listless since the '87 and '88 squads. It should be mentioned that neither of those squads returned 18 starters AND both specialists. This team is exactly where I expected them to be after five games. The only difference is that the Vests’ 2008 team has yet to lay the wood to an inferior squad. On our College Football Preview show I said this was a ten win team so let’s look at the schedule the rest of the way.

Hello Wisconsin. After a double shot of Ipecac gag job the Badgers get OSU at Camp Randall under the lights. This has all the makings of a Bucky Badger ambush. If OSU forces the Badgers sub standard passing game to have to make plays( Coach Heacock 8 men in the box is a GOOD IDEA this week) then OSU wins BIG. How it Will probably go down: Tress punts and plays defense keeps it close and Wisconsin wins an UGLY one.

Purdue. Really??? OSU sends Joe Tiller out no with a thumping’

TSUN Lite. Return of the 8 man front. If you stop Ringer you stop Sparty. However, Dantonio is Vest Lite so an upset is not out of the question. OSU close.

State Penn. Anybody else having a 1994 flashback? Lions roll at the shoe.

Northwestern. If the Cubs are still playing, the locals won’t care. Bucks feast like they’re at Genos’ East. Pryor and Wells vs. Bacher Advantage Bucks.

The Zooks. I said after the OSU 2006 Houdini Job at Illinois that 2008 would be their year. After what State Penn did to them….. My opinion hasn’t changed. Juice is on tap in Champaign.

TSUN. This game worried me all along; by late November they should be better. This is a blackjack game. First team to 21 wins.

Ohio State should be favored in 5 of their last 7 games. I think they go 5-2 the rest of the way, losing to losing to State Penn and Illinois, although a 3-4 finish is not out of the realm of possibility.

2008-09-28

Careful Tress...you're staring 7-5 in the face

By Jeremy Lynch

So Beanie's back. Fourteen carries, 106 yards and a Knoshown Moreno impersonation on a hurdle-the-defender type move during Ohio State's 34-21 victory over Minnesota last Saturday. The Buckeyes are still in trouble.

The defense is still soft as a baby's bottom and the offensive line couldn't push it's way out of a twinkie. The passing game is nearly non-existent when Terrelle Pryor is in the game, and ditto for the running game when Beanie is on the sideline.

After what I've seen from the Big Ten this year, OSU will be lucky to go 4-4 in conference. I know that sounds crazy, but let's take a quick look at the remaining schedule.

Wisky. Bucky gagged at TSUN, how I don't know, but they did. Camp Randall will be even more crazy than usual as the Badgers will be a little upset. Hell, I'd be pissed too. Stomach acid burns your throat on the way back up. The Badgers will circle the wagons, pound the ball on the ground behind their huge offensive line and Heacock and the boys will just sit there and take it. And when they finally stop the run, Wisky will go up top and burn a soft zone defense. Pryor and Beanie will do their best to keep the Bucks in it, but it won't be enough. Loss.

Purdon't. Or should I say actually be respectful and say Purdue? The Boilers' defense is a sieve. Losing to the Domers? Come on. I'll say that even The Vest won't be able to mess this one up, even if Wilford Brimley is on the opposing sideline. Win.

At the Lites. As in TSUN Lite. Michigan State has shown some life under second-year head coach Mark Dantonio. But the one way you can't beat OSU is pound Javon Ringer a million times. I know they've got some injuries to their wideouts, but any ol' wideout will do against Heacock's defense. Sparty will have to throw the ball around a little bit, but I think they find a way to get it done and send the Buckeyes tumbling out of the Top 25. Loss.

State Penn. JoePoo and the boys have definitely turned the corner offensively. The Spread HD, or whatever they're calling it, puts even good defenses on their heels. I can only imagine what it will do to OSU's powder-puff zone attack. The Nittany Lions will get their first win in the 'Shoe in a big way. Loss.

At the Mildcats. It's a new day in the Big Ten when Northwestern poses a threat to the Buckeyes, but such is life. This team will be able to score some points against OSU, not that that is saying much. I still don't think they have enough athletes to stop the Buckeyes, but only if Beanie is still healthy. Win.

At the Zooks. I'd love to say that there would be some pay back, but Illinois has too much talent on the offensive side of the ball, and this game is in Champaign. It sold out in like 7 minutes. Memorial Stadium will be loud, for once. I know the Illini can't stop much of anything, so OSU keeps it close. Loss.

TSUN. The Super Bowl for The Vest. Tress still thinks this is a big game, no matter if the teams are both ass. I thought this was a lock earlier, but now I'm not so sure. I know it's here, and Dick Rod's boys are pathetic, but stranger things have happened. Just ask Coop. Win.

So there you go. Not that far fetched to see OSU go 7-5. Then we'll see if Tress is really willing to go down with the ship (assistant coaches I'm looking at you.)

2008-09-25

Ryder Cup humble pie is tasty

By Terry Brown, Senior Contributor

Well...I admit I got it wrong. I thought that once again the U.S. teams individual talent would give way against the demands of team play. Here is how I saw it:

What I saw before the event:

- A European team full of Ryder Cup experience and success
- A U.S. team with limited Ryder Cup success..and no real leaders among them.
- A U.S. team who's oldest member did not play in a major this year.
- A U.S. team who's highest ranked player had carelessly thrown away a U.S. Open..and made it clear he was not looking to be a leader...(his words not mine)
- A U.S. team who' Captain insisted on four at-large picks...and then bypassed higher ranked players for newbies and also-ran's.

What I should have seen:

- Paul Azinger's will and determination to win...especially when it involves Faldo
- The impact of the unassuming...and endearing nature of local heroes Kenny Perry, J. B. Holmes, and Boo Weekley
- The infectious grit of Jim Furyk.
- The legitimacy of Justin Leonard's overachieving history in this event.
- The impact of Darren Clarke's absence...the heart and soul of recent European success.

What no one could foresee:

- That Sergio would fail to display even a glimmer of his unbridled enthusiasm and former Ryder Cup success.
- That the Lee Westwood stare-down would fail to defy...or deny...the juggernaut led by two good ol' boys with a dip in their mouth...and a cannon in their bag.
- That Padraig...winner of three majors in eighteen months, would be a non-factor on Day 3.
- That the U.S. would lead after Day 1...for the historians in the crowd...not since 1991

What everyone saw:

- A U.S. team that completely accepted...and finally executed...it's Captain's vision for victory
- A European team that also clearly resembled it's Captain; singularly successful...expectant of victory...and dismissive in defeat.
- A real-life version of Nick Cage/John Travolta in Face Off (1997). Unbelievable in premise...and yet somehow acceptable...as the Euros assumed that consistently off the pace, lack-luster identity of recent U.S. teams.
- That with youth comes an unabashed lack of fear...clearly evident when Kim called out Sergio...and the Rules Official...for the nonsense involved in Sergio's claim of an impeded stance. "...you do what you need to do..."
- Hunter Mahan's birdie.
- J.B. Holmes...a.k.a. Tony D'Aanunzio... "...well....you aint gettin' no Coke..."
- The effect of a true home field advantage.
- That the Ryder Cup needs more Ferhety and McCord...and less of everyone at NBC. Their coverage is my father's Oldsmobile!!
- Day 1 and 2 are for die-hard fans...but TV needs both teams to show up ready to play on Day 3.
- Ian Poulter...who came to play every day.
- Phil being Phil...an occasional flash of brilliance...while mostly riding his partner in team play...then tanking it up in the individual round.
- The Euros once again winning the uniform battle. Someone please tell me why...in a sport that defines...and is defined by...fashion...must we always choose the worst looking uniforms?
- No Tiger...but plenty of MJ. Did they have a camera dedicated to him? Memo to NBC...Enough already...we get it...he knows Tiger...Memo to MJ...jeans inside the ropes...c'mon....dress for success my friend.
- And finally...Tracy Stewart...at the event her husband loved so much....happily sharing in the success of his best friend.

2008-09-18

Valhalla victory for Americans? Probably not

By Terry Brown, Senior Contributor

Here we go again...

The Ryder Cup has nothing in common with professional golf...or rather PGA Tour golf as we know it. Yet everyone will watch...bemoan the inevitable...and sit in wonder as to how the top U.S. players can get it handed to them time and again. So let me explain:

THE COURSE

Valhalla...as all of you know is the site where David...or rather...Bob May...almost slew the fiercest Tiger in the world. However...it is a different Valhalla. And once again...the David's of the golfing world...the U.S. Ryder Cup Team...will try in vain to slay another Goliath.

Captain Azinger has spent the last 18 months setting up the course to resemble a typical PGA Tour event. SO WHAT? That is never the real issue for the U.S. team, or the European teams of the last quarter century. The Euro's had a challenge with our style long ago...but European golf is no longer exclusively played on links-style courses in 30 mph winds and 45 degree temps. They have adapted their courses, and game to fit PGA Tour style...and have not looked back since.

However, it is a home field...Kenny Perry knows it well...and if the Derby Crowd makes an appearance...it might just give a slight nod to the Home Team.

Advantage: 1/2 point to the U.S.

FORMATS

The issue is, was and will continue to be the format.

First of all...it is Match Play...which has different rules than Stroke Play. There is an art to Match Play. Not the least of which is when to concede the putt. For example...give the four foot testers early...so that they have no feel for that distance late. Regardless...gamesmanship is the rule of the day.

Foursome Match Play (Alternate shot): Two players per side, alternating shots as only one ball is in play for each side.

WHAT...I don't play my own ball? This may not be of issue to those of you, who when asked what ball you play respond with..."whatever I find when looking at the edge of the pond for my own ball..." But let's say Anthony Kim is paired with Phil...I can tell you from first hand experience that the Callaway ball performs quite differently from the Nike. Launch angle...flight, carry, spin, release..all chosen to fit the individual players style. Again...that makes no difference when you place your trust in the sprinkler head...but for those who play to exact yardages...again...trust me...it makes a difference. As Ben Hogan once said when his caddie responded with a vague yardage assessment..."...which is it...142 or 143." To these guys, everything matters. Everything is about precision.

Advantage: European's 3 points

Four-Ball Match Play (Best Ball): Two players per side, each playing their own ball. The team only scores one ball...the best ball per hole.

So..the basic strategy is simple huh...put a big hitter with a good putter...put the gambler with the safety net. Blah Blah Blah. This is ALL about personality and compatibility. Trust me...when "big hitter" bombs his third consecutive drive into the woods...and good putter has to constantly scramble to keep them from getting closed out...it better be more about the team than the individual. Trouble is...the Euro's are soooo much better at this than us....and in more ways than one.

Advantage: European TEAM...3 points

The Final Day...Individual Match Play. This is without a doubt the biggest day for the U.S, but will be too little too late. We have seen miraculous comebacks...but with SIX rookies on this years team...I'm not sure that miracle will materialize. In the U.S. we are raised to play the course...not the other players. It is an individual game...but not this week...this week is about team..and tuxedo's...and matching shirts.... It may be played on home turf...but they are on foreign ground when it comes to this format.

Advantage: U.S. 2 points

But if you think it is just that easy, here is the roster...with the World Ranking in parentheses. How would you pair them?

Harrington (3) v. Mickelson (2)
Sergio (4) v. Cink (8)
Stenson (6) v. Stricker (9)
Westwood (12) v.Furyk (13
Rose (14) v. Kim (15)
Jimenez (18) v. Perry (17)
Karlson (21) v. Leonard (23)
Poulter (23) v. Curtis (33)
McDowell (29) v Weekley (35)
Casey (35) v. Mahan (37)
Hansen (45) v. Chad Campbell (53)
Wilson (51) v. Holmes (55)

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